Bloody sex

As a female human, roughly once a month I like to bleed from my uterus. I love it in fact, because every month is a beautiful reminder that I don't have to go to the doctor screaming hysterically to 'get this thing out of me' before the fateful 26 week time frame. What I don't love however, is the general ickiness of my period. I have been having a period for like 6 years roughly, and every month is still met with urgh gross ew blood ahh tampon. I don't know if this is due to the fact I am grossly immature, or simply because seeing brown-red clumpy blood dripping from your vagina is horrifying.

Coupled with this however, is the 'issue' of sex on your period. As a highly sexual person (borderline nymphomaniac) I don't really like having to take a week out of every month in which all I do is eat chocolate and cry at the notebook (because I'm a woman right haha thanks guys). I prefer to just get on with it. Theres nothing much different between period sex and non-period sex, apart from you probs have to do it on a towel and your partner might freak out a bit at the fact his penis is covered in your uterine lining. But if he is a consenting adult who is responsible and actually like a bit mature, he won't mind that much. And if he does then maybe you should sit him down and have a strong word because it's your body and a bit of blood doesn't stop a woman from having needs goddammit. 

 I once read somewhere that your orgasms go in opposite waves when you're on your period, but to be honest I've never really noticed much difference. Frankly though, when I orgasm I probably wouldn't notice if North Korea had launched missiles and the entire room started to buzz with radioactive energy. One thing I have noticed however is after sex on my period I get the most awful cramps in the world. Like horrible. Like half an hour after sex I'm curled up in a ball asking my lover to make me a hot water bottle (which they always do because I like to choose guys who are considerate to other humans feelings). 

Another thing is the infamous 'if the river runs red, take the dirt track instead' phrase. Well let me tell you, if you wanna take it up the butt you're going to have to think of a better reason than a bleeding vagina. This is how I imagine the situation is met by most people:
Girl: I'm on my period so not tonight
Boy: But I wanna have sex, can I put it in your butt?
Girl: Well yeah actually thats a good idea I never thought of that
And up the pooper it goes. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with anal sex. Like seriously, no qualms. But you just gotta do it because you want to, not because your partner can't bear a bit of blood and because you are embarrassed of your own bodies functions. 

So go foward and fuck on your period if you want to. If you're comfortable and horny, why the fuck not?